2003-04-29 - 10:27 a.m.
ASK NATALIE PART TWO!!
Q: We are in a dire situation. We moved to Vermont from Seattle on a bit of a whim. We were young, stupid, and in love. Now, ten short months later, we have come to face some harsh realities. Vermont fucking sucks. Summer is sweltering and humid, and I don't even want to discuss the winter we just survived.
Luckily we still have our health, our pets, and our love, but we need to get the hell out of dodge as soon as possible. What we seek is some advice as to where to head next. Oue lease ends in September, and if nothing else strikes our fancy we will be hittin' the road back to Seattle on the first of that month.
Ideas? Suggestions? Free money to help us out for gas?
Stuck in A Forsaken Land
A: you know, its not that bad. you are young, and there is nothing better to do when you are young than stupid stuff like moving to vermont and then moving somewhere else.
i like seattle. i think it is really pretty, and if you guys have to move back there, it wouldnít be to bad. have you thought of anywhere else out west, like portland? i remember thinking portland was real nice, too. but then again, i was only in those places for a day or two, and living there might be totally different.
if you want my opinion on where to move, may i suggest the most underappreciated city in the midwest, COLUMBUS OHIO? i moved here thinking it would be somewhere to be until i went somewhere else, but 5 years later, i canít imagine leaving. itís a really nice place.
the metropolitan population is 1,500,000 people. pretty big. but all the people are real nice. there is all kinds of music stuff and art stuff going on. a lot of business. the weather isnít too bad... definitly a lot better than vermont. best of all, it is really cheap compared to other cities. i have a 3 bedroom apartment in a nice, safe area, and i only pay 450 a month (225, since i have a roomate.)
also, BET rated it the best place in the US for black people to live, just in case you are black. there is an active gay community. its real easy to get involved in local politics. you can be as liberal as you want, and after you are done being all liberal, you can go see daniel johnston.
in closing, columbus, ohio is a good place to go if you donít wanna go back to seattle! (i think that is a good slogan. that or COLUMBUS OHIO!! THE CITY NOWHERE NEAR THE SEA!!)
Q: How can I tell if my uh... friend... is gay or not?
A: umm. hmm. this has to be the vaguest question ever. do you mean how can you tell if your friend is gay cause you want him to be? or because you donít want them to be? or how can you tell if you are gay? i will answer this twice.
in the case you are wondering if your friend is gay cause you wanna get with them, it canít hurt to ask, as long as youíre not really good friends, in which case it could make your friendship real weird. if you wanna know cause you are not down with that, i would say to ignore it. its not your business who they sleep with as long as they arenít trying to make you sleep with them and you donít want to.
if the friend in question is actually you, i would say experiment. go out on dates. see who floats your boat. it should come to you eventually.
Q: dear natalie
i have a BIG problem. my friend introduced me to this guy, and i liked him and he liked me, so he asked me out a week or two ago. my friend is really upset though, coz she says that we spend way too much time with each other and she is getting jealous. i love her a lot but she is around way too much and i just cant stand her being around every single day, but i dont want to say anything coz i dont wanna hurt her feelings. but then again, spending so much time together has caused me to get very irritated and yell at her a lot, so we get in a lot of fights. we are very close and i dont want to stop being friends with her, but im really pissed off about her being around all the time and getting upset when i have boyfriends. how can i tell her to stop being jealous... in a nice way?
A: you have only been seeing this guy for two weeks. you are probably real enamored with him and vice versa. you are probably spending a lot of time with him. and your friend probably misses you. do you still spend time with her alone? if you do, when you guys hang out do you just talk about him the whole time? there has to be a reason she is acting like that that is not just jealousy. she introduced the two of you, after all, so she canít be totally against you dating.
try to divvy up your time more. spend time with your friends and your boyfriend. be reasonable. if you try to spend time with everyone, nobody will feel sad and left out.
if you have been doing all this stuff, and she is still not happy, you can talk to her about it. donít do it in an accusing way. just tell her how much her friendship means to you and how it makes you sad when she seems upset. tell her there is no reason for her to be jealous, cause your relationship with your boyfriend is totally different that your relationship with her.
itís important to keep the peace with your friends, cause your friends are always there for you, but boyfriends can dump you whenever they feel like it, even if you think they are really great and wonderful. you donít want to be the girl who chooses some guy over their friends, cause if and when you break up, things can get really lonely.