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2003-02-25 - 12:28 p.m.

for the last, i dunno, two years i have not had cable.

i don't really watch tv that much. i'll watch the simpsons once in awhile, but usually it doesn't occur to me to turn it on.

so i called some place to get DSL, and they had this deal where i could get DSL and cable for some absurdly low price. like, i would be stupid to not spring for the cable. so yesterday i got that shit hooked up, and in the last two days i think i have watched about an hour of tv.

this is what i learned:

1. I WILL NEVER BE AS COOL AS MISSY ELLIOT. she is freaking cool as hell. i am usually not all about choreography in videos, but i could watch her dance around all day. and i like her fuzzy hats. i need to get one of those.

2. IT IS QUITE POSSIBLE TO WATCH LAW AND ORDER ALL DAY LONG. when you don't have cable you can only watch it 3 times a week, but when you do have cable, you can watch it more times than that in ONE DAY.

3. HOME MOVIES IS ON EVERY WEEK NIGHT. home movies is one of my favorite shows. back in the day it was on the WB or some other second-rate tv channel, and as soon as i figured out when it was on exactly, they cancelled it. then i went without for a very long time. now i can watch it at 11:30 every night.

4. IF YOU ARE SUPER-LUCKY, M2 WILL PLAY AN HOUR-LONG BLOCK OF GRUNGE ROCK VIDEOS. you will think it is real awesome for a second, then they will just play all the videos from the singles soundtrack, and not play any dinosaur jr or sonic youth or breeders or anything. then you will change the channel.

5. MISSY ELLIOT IS STILL REALLY AWESOME. grr. i am telling you. cool as hell. in a perfect world, i would have a fuzzy hat and dance around. either that or i would be kim deal.

thank you

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